Umbridge’s Pet


I sent this owl to say
Congrats on becoming a prefect; that’s great
The Minister himself told me
We’re amazed you took responsibility
I’m so glad that you chose
To be like me, rather than Fred and George
As a prefect, you could be set
But there is one thing I must recommend

Cut your ties with that Harry Potter
Even though I know he’s like your brother
And Dumbledore’s favorite
But the Ministry has a different perspective
Some big changes are about to happen
See tomorrow’s Daily Prophet
See if you can spot yours truly

I can’t just give things away
So I’ll be careful how I say
That Umbridge should be your goal
And she’s delightful, once you get to know her
It’s been hard to get her feet on the ground
But should be better, when owl post comes around
So knock it off with Harry’s ploy
And you’ll have a real shot at making Head Boy

At making Head Boy

Hold Ms Umbridge up on your shoulders
Protect her like a Keeper keeps his goals
Forget what our parents tell you, and I guarantee that if you do
You’ll be placed in Head Boyship in a couple of years

Let’s get back to Harry
That friendship’s going to be damaging
I’m sure you heard he was brought into court
Isn’t that a clue it’s time to abort?
He can be a bit unstable
And may be violent, for all I know
So, don’t believe his tales as a friend
Umbridge will make sure they’re put to an end

‘Cause he must not tell lies
Yeah, he must not tell lies
He must not tell lies
He must not tell lies

Hold Ms Umbridge up on your shoulders
Protect her like a Keeper keeps his goals
Forget what our parents tell you, and I guarantee that if you do
You’ll be placed in Head Boyship in a couple of years

Hold Ms Umbridge up on your shoulders
Protect her like a Keeper keeps his goals
Forget what our parents tell you, and I guarantee that if you do
You’ll be placed in Head Boyship

You’ll be placed in Head Boyship
You’ll be placed in the Ministry in just three years
You’ll be with me in the Ministry in just three years

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